Today's my birthday. SIGH. I'm not doing a dance or eating cake, I'm thinking about being 37 which is in itself is depressing. I hate to tell you this but each birthday bringing you one year closer to......T H E.... B I G.... H O U S E..
Y I K E S ......Maybe that's just my "Capricorn pessimistic take" on it anyhow, and I don't want to ruin it for the rest of you who eat cake, celebrate and get lots of good presents and are actually excited about the aging process. Pardon me while I go and search on EBay for that Michael Jackson anti-aging oxygen reduction tank sleeping system because I'd like to push the "29 and holding" theme for as long as I can get away with it. hee heeh.
So I was thinking about things I want to do in my life .... and the things I've done. The people that have come and gone and the choices I've made. Regrets? I've had a few. I often wonder what would have happened had my life taken a different path, would I still be in this exact spot today?
I look back over half my life ago, when I was a teenager and still at Overlea High School. I was rebellious, and only talked to a few people in my little circle or group, but it wasn't because I didn't like the other people. It was because I had a whole big world of my own that most people didn't know about. I wonder however, did anyone really know what was going on with me?
My parents put our house up for sale and moved to Maine when I was in 11th grade. The thought of leaving Baltimore for pine trees and nothingness did not appeal to me back then (but does to me now) Baltimore was the land of opportunity to me. I wanted to be so many things, a business woman, maybe a clothing buyer, or even a Lawyer. My brother was only 10 and it killed me to make the decision to stay as we would be 800 miles apart but stay I did.
I went to Mr. James Heckman who ran a Marketing program and asked for his help. He told me if I worked hard enough, I could make it on my own but the road would be less traveled and much harder. He said I would have to sacrifice lots of things, no parties, no friends, no Senior Week, no life, but I was up for the challenge. I then made the decision to turn down a partial college scholarship which my counselors thought I was crazy for. The plan was, I went to school half day in 11th and 12th grade in Mr. Heckman's Marketing & Management program . I worked at Della Rose's at night and on weekends (I still love you Mrs. Josie!), Macy's during the day and telemarketing at Allstate Insurance several other nights a week. I was out in the big world, no time for friends, I had myself to take care of. Car insurance, rent, utilities, OUCH.
I moved up the corporate ladder and held some interesting positions along my way. I was driving a convertible Corvette by the time I was 22. I remember early on I was a Quality Assurance Manager for MCI , then an Assistant to the Regional Director for a Dating Service (it was on the up and up I swear). Over time I would work at a Comic book company and even manage a Tanning Salon.
If anyone would have told me I'd end up an artist, author and be slicing and grilling over 5000 pounds of beef for Big Fat Daddy's I would have said they were nuts! What if I had done things different, would I have five kids? Who would I be married to? Or would I be right here, right now?
I'm so busy that I consider a good work day getting 60% of my to-do list done. I think it's safe to say I'm running four months behind on everything. My family knows I can never make their cookouts and I can't remember the last time I had dinner with friends. Work is consuming my life but this was my dream and I'm living it. I can't even make some of my own museum openings life is just that crazy.
Each morning I think the coffee manufacturers are changing up the recipe or quality of beans thereby shorting the caffeine in my coffee. I find myself needing more to get started. I can never find my keys and I'm always running late. I lose my cellphone often and I can't get enough sleep. Did I forget to call you back? Don't take it personal. I forgot today was my birthday.
Truth is, I'm getting older. Life is getting shorter and there's still so many things I want to do.
So, here's my to-do list and I'm going to officially work on these, figuring that they are even that much more of a priority since I'm posting my TOP TEN for the world to see. This will force me to get them accomplished!
1) Publish a greenie art book --a How-To Make Trash into Treasure for families on a budget.
2) Volunteer in Baltimore doing some art seminars with kids how to make art out of trash.
3) Get Big Fat Daddy's famous Dry Rub seasoning into households everywhere.
4) Get my husband to the gym so he'll live forever because I love him so. Big Fat Daddy can afford to lose a few right? (Not to mention myself....)
5) Officially get the Ira Mency award launched, in Danforth, Maine to rewards kids for making art and following their dreams.
6) Spend more time in Maine with my family enjoying the great outdoors. 4 wheeler anyone?
7) Visit Wilmington, NC and have a crazy night on the town.
8) Work on a reclaimed outdoor sculpture for Colorado Springs outdoor art competition.
9) Meet more artists and crafters who are doing their part for the environment and get them to join the Etsy Recyclers Team Guild that I'm running now.
10) Get to Montauk. Call it the Eternal Sunshine of my mind or what have you, but nothing would be nicer than spending time with hubby walking along a beautiful beach in the middle of winter when no one is around to bother us. Find some cool shells, washed up sea glass, and other natural art supplies, and spend some time admiring the beauty of the cape and the lighthouse, looking over into Connecticut. The best part, is we can take the time to find ourselves.
So, anyone wanna Meet Me in Montauk?